Sunday, August 23, 2009

If I was a bird, and you was a fish

Last night I made a playlist that contains only songs about or mentioning birds:

1. They Might Be Giants: "Birdhouse in Your Soul"
2. Madness: "Wings of a Dove"
3. Beatles: "Blackbird"
4. Agent Ribbons: "Birds and Bees"
5. Roger Miller: "Reincarnation" ("If I was a bird, and you was a fish, what would we do? I guess we'd wish for reincarnation...")
6. Cake: "Comfort Eagle"
7. The Byrds: "Eight Miles High" (Really just because the band's name is The Byrds.)
8. Yoko Kanno: "Green Bird"
9. The Beatles: "Norwegian Wood (This Bird Has Flown)"
10. Eisley: "Tree Tops" ("I will grow wings and fly everywhere")
11. Kimya Dawson: "Angels and Seagulls"
12. Eels: "I Like Birds"
13. The Nightcrawlers: "The Little Black Egg"
14. Of Montreal: "Peacock Parasols"
15. The Flaming Lips: "It's Summertime" (for the bird sounds in the beginning...)
16. Roger Miller: "What Are Those Things (With Big Black Wings?)"
17. They Might Be Giants: "Bee of the Bird of the Moth"
18. Iron and Wine: "Bird Stealing Bread"
19. TV on the Radio: "Stork & Owl"
20. The Beatles: "Across the Universe" ("Birds are flying out like endless rain into a paper cup"...I know it's actually words flying out, but birds makes more sense to me, that's how I thought it was for a long time.)
21. The Shins: "Girl on the Wing"
22. Of Montreal: "City Bird"
23. Gregory and the Hawk: "Boats and Birds"
24. Grateful Dead: "Little Red Rooster"
25. Bright Eyes: "True Blue"
26. Cake: "Mr. Mastadon Farm" ("Birds fall from the window ledge above mine, and they flap their wings at the last second...")

Aren't you glad you read all that?

I still have no idea where I stand with this guy. I even asked him and he didn't give me a direct answer. He said he wasn't looking for a relationship, that doesn't answer the question of where I stand with him. He came to Pint Night and stood right next to me the entire time. At the party last night, I saw him come in and the first thing he did was stare at me as he walked across the room. I don't know! Why doesn't he go up to me?

There is obviously something there. Every time I'm in the same room with him I can feel his eyes following me, the faces I make and the things I say (which are considerably less because I'm super conscious of it). It's really really hard in a group. Everyone can tell. I had fun as the sober driver, but I kind of wish I'd been wasted. There is no halfway point here. There is no "three beers and I'm happy." Because really, that makes me all the more aware. I can't hide behind alcohol.

1 comment:

Nonny Arie said...

Mer. It's always so damn frustrating when things are up in the air and one feels like the ground isn't really concrete one way or the other (yay for puns!). At this point you really can just let him come to you when he's ready, but I'm sure you know that. :) Just keep being you and don't forget to be awesome.

I love the playlist. I made one abour rainbows the other day, which was fun x3